Being labeled an embarrassment and treated as an invisible annoyance is both demeaning and disheartening.
We have tried. When is it time to realize we don’t belong in white owned spaces? It takes a lot to be trusted by a white person. It now needs to take a lot for us to trust white spaces. No longer can we trust blindly that we are welcomed by public access default.
To have breasts, to have brown skin, to not be obviously heterosexual or binary brings a great deal of discomfort to spaces and people baked into the status quo. Racism, red tape and exclusion are by design. When the words are spoken “I am not a racist” the speaker avows their position as a true Racist. I true believer in the illusion that we are all equal.
I am a racist. I am the purest form of a racist and an alcoholic. I hate breaking my mold to conform to others. I love focusing on what will win me by best out come and I use alcoholic to abate my fears, anxieties and bring moments of happiness and euphoria.
In this honest assessment of who and what we are and for what reasons, we can deliberately break out to open our minds and our hearts. I can now practice patience, sacrifice, manners, support, and explore farther reaches of reality. Admitting to having a social and moral dilemma opens us up to the tools that will help us overcome limitations of the cave or boxes we were born into.
Going At It Alone
All you have is you and your own effort. Do not rely on the words or prior engagement of others. Given a sliver of space to wiggle, humans will flake on you, changing their minds as quickly as the wind changes direction moving in constant circular motions without direction, conviction nor purpose.